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So what is the deal with EFT*?

and why does it matter so much?

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a gentle, deeply human approach to helping couples feel close again. When you come in, we’re not looking for who’s right or wrong — we’re looking for the cycle you get stuck in, the pattern that keeps you missing each other even when you’re both trying your best. Once we understand that cycle, we can start changing it together.

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EFT is an evidence-based therapy, which means it’s been studied, tested, and proven to help couples create lasting change — not just temporary fixes. It’s rooted in real research about love, attachment, and emotional safety. If you’re the kind of person who likes the science behind things, there’s more detailed information later on this page.

I am highly trained in EFT and have worked with hundreds of couples over the years. My approach is direct, compassionate, and effective — I get to the heart of what’s really happening between you and help you rebuild the emotional connection that makes love last. One of the best layman's books on EFT is called Created for Connection. I wrote a blog post about it here or you can buy it on Amazon here. Highly recommended. 

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is considered a leading, evidence-based approach for couples. “Evidence-based” means it’s been tested in clinical studies (including randomized trials) and summarized in meta-analyses—not just therapist opinion. A major systematic review found large improvements in relationship satisfaction with EFT, with gains that lasted at follow-up (Hedges’ g ≈ 2.09—very large). PubMed+2ResearchGate+2

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Independent reviewers have also looked only at the most rigorous trials: an RCT-only meta-analysis reported that EFT reliably improves couple outcomes compared with control conditions, placing EFT among the best-supported treatments for relational distress. PubMed+1

If you’ve heard the “70–75% recovery / ~90% improve” line—those numbers trace back to the early research syntheses led by Dr. Sue Johnson and colleagues and are echoed in later reviews. In short: most couples get significantly better, and a strong majority move out of clinical distress. trieft.org+1

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Beyond general distress, EFT has been tested with couples facing added stressors (like medical illness or depression). Studies show EFT can strengthen intimacy and reduce symptoms while improving the bond—evidence that the method helps people reconnect even under pressure. PMC+1

A comprehensive narrative review concludes EFT meets or exceeds formal standards for an “evidence-based couple therapy,” and it explains why it works: by helping partners see the negative cycle they get stuck in and build a safer, more responsive connection (an attachment-science lens). PubMed

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If you like to read the source papers, here are accessible starting points:

  • Systematic review/meta-analysis (very large effects; durable gains). PubMed+1

  • RCT-only meta-analysis (gold-standard trials). PubMed

  • Classic early meta-analysis (origin of the 70–75% recovery figure). trieft.org

  • Trial in medical stress (cancer survivorship). PMC

  • RCT comparing EFT to usual care for depression + couple distress. PubMed

Bottom line in human terms: EFT doesn’t just teach tips; it helps you find and change the cycle that keeps you missing each other, so safety, closeness, and effective communication become your new default. That’s what “evidence-based” looks like in real life—measurable change that lasts.

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